Sunday, May 27, 2012

Welcome to the World...

Its been a week and two day since Cadence was born. Its still hard to believe that this precious human came out of me. The night  before her big day, I could barely sleep. I kept wondering if everything was going to end up ok and if the health of my child and myself would be ok too.

One dose of the spinal block wasn't enough for me so I was concerned how many shots it would take since the shot itself was so painful. Two doses worked plenty! The whole delivery room was scary, esp with the fact that Charles could not come in with me for the spinal block... and that process itself was delaying the whole surgery. I couldn't stop shaking while I was waiting for the numbness to take over my lower half. I felt so alone even though there were at least five nurses and three doctors. And it really didn't make me feel any better to know I wasn't in the actual Labor and Delivery ward for the possible seriousness of my surgery. I kept asking when Charles would be able to come in and when he was finally able to, it honestly seemed like it had been hours. He held my hand throughout the whole process and I couldn't have asked for anyone better.

Its a very bizzar feeling to be laying there waiting to hear a little one crying in the cold atmosphere. That too seemed to take forever but when I finally heard my first born cry, it was bawling. It was a wonderful, personal experience to see Charles waiting in anticipation for his daughter to make her big debut into the world. It was so hard not being able to see her right when they took her out. I just wanted to see her. And when I finally did... I couldn't believe how beautiful she was. And to know that I was finally meeting for the first time in my life something that was blood related to me was a total blessing from God!

Overall, Cadence seems to be a pretty good baby... for all I know! There's so much I want to get done around the house and start helping out in the garden that sometimes it becomes a little frustrating that I can't do those things quite yet. I have to keep reminding myself and being reminded by others that my job is to rest, heal and take care of Cadence. And as much as I love looking at her and holding her when ever I want, sometimes I just want to be able to do something else so I can actually miss her. But to be honest, I miss her all the time when I decide to let her nap in her crib, so really, I should appreciate the time I have with her more.

From personal experience I have to be very blunt by saying I think all women who are capable, should breast feed their children for at least six months to a year. I understand how a lot of women are afraid or get turned off by breast feeding because of how painful it is at first. Honestly, I even considered not wanting to do it after the second day. But I knew that was just my emotions talking. So, I 'woman-ed up' and stuck to it. And I'm so glad I did. There's a TON of benefits to breastfeeding that I couldn't turn down!

SLEEP: That's a word? I thought I was prepared but I wasn't! Feeding used to be kind of all over the place, which... is natural but now it's come to the point where Cadence has to fall completely asleep in my arms before I can lay her in her crib. That becomes pretty exhausting when I seem to have a bad judgment of when she's finally fallen asleep. But when I hold her again to get her to sleep she expects to be nursed for another hour, if not more. Unfortunately she doesn't actually nurse from me when I have to hold her the second time so when I do finally get her to sleep, she's up a half hour later to be fed.

Today marks the first day of using cloth diapers. Cadence is TINY! She looks super ridiculous but both Charles and I feel better about not contributing to more garbage than we need to. What cute designs too! I'm a HUGE fan of the brand KUSHIES and OSOCOZY! I just wish I had known Kushies had a newborn size.

One of our goats had two baby girl kids! Which is super great news for us!! So much milk that can be turned into ice cream, milk, cheese and butter. What joys we've been given!

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